Last Post

This is to announce that as of today, this blog will no longer be maintained. All content has been moved to a new location at

UPDATE: The RSS feed now works.

You Could Be The One

I seldom post a song, let alone a video clip. But this song has been in my head since I don’t know when, and I love this arrangement with all the strings and everything…

Nobody wants to be alone
The heart beats happy when it has a place
And if it doesn’t have a home
It can come into my space

So you can be the one I love
I can be the one you long for
You can be the one I want… want
And you can be the one I love
This could be our world wide open
You can be the one I want… want

When you’ve fallen for someone
But that someone doesn’t feel the same
But before you come undone
You can call out my name

So you can be the one I love
I can be the one you long for
You can be the one I want… want
And you can be the one I love
This could be our world wide open
You can be the one I want… want

So you can be the one… one one one
I can be the one… one one one
So you can be the one… one one one
I can be the one… one one one

So you can be the one I love
I can be the one you long for
You can be the one I want… want
And you can be the one I love
This could be our world wide open
You can be the one I want… want

I miss my headphones…

Vanilla Me

I realize that just a few months ago I posted about how I should be thankful, how no one was able to be a perfect friend, and that my friends are good enough for me. Well, I just had this thought…

This is not a gripe. Just a thought.

What if… I didn’t have all the things I have right now? What if I didn’t have a 32-inch LED TV? What if I didn’t have a motorbike? What if I didn’t have a MacBook? Or a sound system set? A gym membership?

What if I didn’t know a thing about programming? What if I was stupid? What if I had no arms or no legs or no limbs at all? What if I had that nasty tumor attack me once more and I bleed to an almost certain death?

Nah, it’s getting too extreme… Let’s take a few steps back…

What if I was just… me? Plain-old-me. Vanilla me. No possessions. No wealth. No skills.

Just. Me.

Would you still be my friend? Would you still want to be a friend to me?

Would you ask if I wanted to go to the beach? Would you text me or buzz me just to see if I’m OK? Would you care if I hadn’t eaten lunch? Would you tell me how your mom scolded your sister because she went out with the wrong boy? Would you share a bowl of fruits with me because both of us couldn’t afford a full meal? Would you ask me to meet up just so we could talk about anything and everything until both of us couldn’t keep our eyes open anymore?

Would you?

Gripe of The Day


Nuff said.

Obviously Oblivious

This morning, as usual, I picked up a friend and whisked us to the office on my dear motorcycle. I wasn’t racing, but I wasn’t a snail either. We got through traffic just fine and arrived at the final U-turn, about 300 meters away from our final destination. I pressed on the brakes and we slowed down to an almost complete stop. I saw that the oncoming traffic was still about half a kilometer away and I decided I could make the turn. So I did.

But I was wrong.

Some guy on an old rusty motorcycle yelled at me for making a near-miss. My heart must’ve skipped a beat, because I was still trembling when we got off the bike at the office’s parking lot a few minutes later.

Then I stopped for a moment and thought about how I got into that situation. I was making a U-turn, and… where the heck did that old man come from? He was on the other side of the bypass divider, facing the oncoming traffic. And he yelled at me? What the &u©k? How dare he yell at me when I was the victim?

But see, that’s traffic in Indonesia. You’ve got to get used to it. You must adjust yourself and be vigilant at all times, because who the heck knows what the guy in front of you will do in a split-second. He might swerve left, or right, stop smack dab in the middle of the road; heck, he might as well make a U-turn in the middle of a busy highway without so much as activating his turn signal or look at the rear-view mirror. Yes, everything’s possible.

As for my passenger? Not a word she said, even until we got to our cubicles. In fact, not a word she said since she got on the bike behind me. So I guess I’m the weird guy here, because she’s obviously oblivious.

Satisfaction Guaranteed

So I was just thinking about the past few weeks. Dissatisfaction had become the central theme of a lot of major conversations surrounding me. A lot of people are complaining about this and that and whatnot, and mostly it’s because they don’t get paid enough. It’s the “What’s In It For Me?” factor.

Well, let’s just list all the reasons I should be thankful. I’ll start with the things that money can’t buy:

  1. I have a wonderful, caring, loving family. Both my parents are alive and well, and they still work. My sister is starting a small business with her friends. We can still go to church together whenever I go home to Yogyakarta.
  2. My extended family is also fun to be with and most of them are in good shape (physically, financially, whatever).
  3. I have a lot of friends ranging from people I met in elementary school to work colleagues who have become some of my best friends. Good friends are hard to come by, and not any one person is capable of being the perfect friend, but my friends are good enough for me.
  4. My English is good, I believe in my logic, and I can play several musical instruments. All this I owe to God.
  5. I get to work on something that I love: programming. Work and office life is not always fun, but for the most part, it’s quite enjoyable.

Next, for the “mathematicians” among the readers, here are the things money and statistics can measure:

  1. I had retinoblastoma. Retinoblastoma occurs on 1 of every 18,000 – 30,000 live births worldwide, and currently more than 90% of infants having retinoblastoma survive. Ten minutes of googling and five minutes of math would tell you that in 1984 there are between 300 to 500 infant deaths worldwide due to retinoblastoma. I survived, and I believe I wasn’t just part of a set of statistics. My survival is a miracle.
  2. I can read and write. This might seem like a very trivial thing, but about 16.8 million Indonesians are still illiterate.
  3. I have a Bachelor’s Degree, majoring in Electrical Engineering. Primary school net attendance ratio in Indonesia is above 85%, which means more than 85% of children aged 6-12 years (primary school age) actually attend primary school. Secondary school net attendance ratio drops to about 57%, and as you can imagine higher education NAR drops to well below that (no actual figure available yet).
  4. I have a job, and the longest period I have been unemployed is less than a month. No matter how stressed I am at work, I will be more stressed if I am unemployed. As of 2010, the estimated unemployment rate in Indonesia is 7.2% of the workforce, which amounts to around 8.4 million people.
  5. I have an income level that allows me to live comfortably, support my parents if only a bit, and aid others who are in need. I’m certain that my income level enables me to live well above the $1.25 PPP (purchasing power parity), and even well above $2.00 PPP. In Indonesia, as of 2010, 50.6% of the population (118.4 million) live with $2.00 PPP, and 18.7% of the population (43.7 million) have to make do with a $1.25 PPP.
  6. I can afford a nice boarding house and have three meals a day. Some say that there are more than 3 million homeless people in Indonesia alone. They probably sleep under bridges or on the streets, live on one or two meals per day, have no appropriate clothing to protect them from the heat of the sun or the pouring rain, and have to worry every day about getting scooped up by the local police.
  7. I have a company-sponsored health insurance policy. Last time I used it, I had a bad case of bacteria infection in my stomach and it would’ve cost me $40 if I didn’t have that covered.
  8. I get to fly home at least twice a year. The company covers the tickets, and even gives me a little bit more than necessary so that I can treat my family and friends to a really nice dinner every time I get home.
  9. I have a motorcycle. As of 2009, there are “only” 70.7 million motorized vehicles in Indonesia, more than 52 million of those being motorcycles. Keeping in mind that Indonesia’s public transportation system is not desirable, I consider owning my own motorcycle a privilege. And yes, I paid for it myself (settled the entire loan in under a year, at that), another privilege if I may say so.
  10. I have a cellphone. About 35% of Indonesia’s population (81.9 million people) can’t afford to have a mobile cellular telephone subscription.
  11. I have an internet connection. Two, in fact. As of July 2011, internet penetration in Indonesia is only 21%, which means more than 63 million people aged 15 – 65 in Indonesia have no internet access.
  12. I can spend less then I earn, and thus have quite a bit of money left at the end of the month to transfer to my savings account. A lot people have trouble with their shopping habits and a lot more have trouble just making their ends meet.

There you go. This list could go on with all the luxuries that I can afford for myself. I’m not the richest guy in the world, but there are a lot more people who don’t have what I have now. To put things in perspective, here’s a list of some people that I met during my last visit to Yogyakarta that are thankful for what they have:

  1. A geek friend who is struggling to keep his computer store open while paying the operating costs of it and dealing with the gambler landlord and pesky police officers. Thank God, all I have to do is what my boss tells me to do, and I get paid. I don’t have to worry about me going out of business (at least, for now), getting an eviction notice, or being in jail.
  2. A friend in adventures who works graveyard shifts while working on her thesis because she’s been paying her own tuition fees since her first year in college. Thank God, all I had to do was text my mom and she’d give me money to pay my tuition, all the way until graduation.
  3. A friend in gaming who dropped out of college and is now struggling to stay on top of things by learning to be a property reseller. If the business slows down, he would have to go for months on end on practically nothing. Thank God, I never have to worry about next month’s salary.

Alright, so this post is starting to get too long to read. With all the reasons to be thankful I mentioned above (and many more I couldn’t write down), if I’m still complaining, I should be ashamed of myself.

So, dear God, teach me not to focus on what I have not, but on what I can share with others. Teach me to focus on my privileges rather than my limitations. Teach me to appreciate the littlest of things that other people may not be able to experience.

Satisfaction guaranteed.

It’s Not On Me, It’s Not On You, It’s On Both of Us

One of a few things I hate about visits from friends and family is the nonsense that everyone blurts out about not wanting to trouble the other party. Simple example: paying for dinner.

Honestly, I’m not gonna pay for your dinner if I don’t feel like it. You should do the same.

I am not one who likes to take advantage of friends or family. But here’s the thing: if you said you wanted to pay for dinner, I take it that you really do want to pay for dinner and not just being nice for the sake of maintaining a good relationship. A good friendship is not measured in how fancy a dinner you could buy me. Heck, we could share a bowl of instant noodles for all I care.

So don’t offer to pay for dinner unless you mean it, because I won’t hesitate to accept the offer. And when I say I want to pay for dinner, please just let me do it because I feel like doing it. If we both feel like paying for it, we should simply split the bill. Frankly, if you don’t want to trouble me, don’t come visit me.

I don’t know about you guys, but to me it’s that simple.

DISCLAIMER: This is not a rant about a friend’s visit that went sour. My good friend Andy treated me to a lot of fancy dishes these last two days, and I gotta tell you I enjoyed every one of them! He does, too, because he values the quality of our conversations more than any dish. And I know for a fact that he’s not a pretentious person.

Ambidextrous No More

So I’ve been visiting RTC Denpasar twice, annoying my friend about twice a week for three weeks, and scouring the interwebs to get a hold of this:

Logitech Attack 3

Logitech Attack 3

Sadly, nobody had it. Word is that the supply was halted from I don’t know where. Bottom line is that there is no telling when a resupply would take place.

A couple of friends suggested some other series that I might be interested in, particularly from Genius. I wasn’t interested, because I had no knowledge of the product quality. Yokes from Saitek were also offered, but they were way beyond my price range. A few days later I found Attack 3 at an online store and I immediately ordered it. Sadly, it was out of stock, too, and the warehouse admin probably forgot to update its status on the page. The sales guy offered to bump it up a class and I only had to add about $16 for it, so I said sure. So this is what I got:

Logitech Extreme 3D Pro

Logitech Extreme 3D Pro

 This baby fails in one requirement I made for myself: it is not ambidextrous. I thought I was gonna have some problems flying with my right hand, because (1) I’m left-handed and (2) I couldn’t access the mouse while I played. As it turns out, my right hand works just fine. I guess the same thing happened when I first learned to use the mouse with my right hand, to save everybody the trouble of providing a left-handed mouse. And the mouse, it turns out I didn’t need it so bad, and whenever I needed it I could always revert to using the trackpad with my left hand, which was free anyway.

So there you have it, my new joystick. I’ve flown a couple of times using it on 737s, 747s, Cessnas, various vintage planes, and even an F-14. I’ve also managed to land a 737 manually in a crosswind, not to mention F-14 night landings (which were particularly hard because of the high approach speed). I’m overall satisfied, and although I do hope that someday I’ll have my own virtual cockpit, this little guy is more than enough for now.

The Pursuit of Perfection

Perfection is an elusive goal. In some cases, it is practically impossible to achieve perfection. Take a simple example: finding a perfect boarding house. Now, this is a true story, my story.

When I first came to Bali, a new friend of mine took me to see a potential boarding house. I immediately took it, not because it’s perfect, but because it’s logical. I’m a new guy, I have to find a place to live, pronto. As it turns out, it was a great boarding house. The owners (and their kids) were all smiles and happy to welcome me, neighbors minded their own business and for the most part didn’t cause any trouble, the cost is affordable, and the room’s got quite some space. I got used to the dogs barking their heads off in the middle of the night. But later on, after the owner’s mom got sick — mind you, she’s a 98-year-old grandma with a case of a never-healing-broken-arm — things got a bit complicated.

How would you like to wake up hearing a very old lady moaning and calling out someone’s name, while trying to scrape pieces of plastic off of her broken arm, plus the family’s helper dragging an empty bucket just outside your front door? Add to that the setting: 2 a.m., in the middle of a thunderstorm and a soundtrack of dogs whimpering, while the smell of burnt incense from the day’s evening prayers hasn’t gone away.

I do not want to be there when she passes away. (not that I want her to, but you know… it’s frickin’ eerie!)

I was lucky enough that a friend offered me a vacant room at her boarding house, one that I’ve had my eyes on since a few months back. So I immediately took the opportunity. I was delighted. The room was bigger and had better flooring and walls, air circulation was much better, and best of all I had no worries about midnight wake-up calls from any dogs. Oh, and of course I was excited to finally have neighbors that I actually know. Little did I know…

I got me lots of new neighbors. But this one right next door… oh man… I still wake up at 2 a.m. sometimes, not because of dogs barking or old ladies moaning, but because of the fights they have. She’d yell and scream and cry at the same time and he’d just rub it in her face. And then she’d hurl a cellphone to my wall and it breaks to pieces. And the words… oh, the words just couldn’t get any harsher.

I could handle the noises just fine, I just thought of them as wild dogs barking their heads off and biting each other. But the harsh words, they get me tense every time. There were times when I really wanted to come out with my broom and just knock her out (and then deal with her boyfriend).

But she’s the owner’s niece. I strike her and I’m out.

So there you have it. The pursuit of a perfect place to live. I’m not talking about a huge palace with a swimming pool and jacuzzi (although it wouldn’t hurt if I could afford such a place), but a place where I can just live peacefully in a community where everybody has good manners and are thoughtful enough to minimize disturbance to everybody else.

Quite impossible, it seems.

UPDATE: It turns out that as I was writing this post, the now 99-year-old lady really passed away. My sincere condolences for the kind family that looked after me for that wonderful year.

Tentang Profesionalisme Guru

Tulisan ini adalah tanggapan untuk blog post sahabat saya yang mengkritisi sikap profesional guru. Ini bukanlah sanggahan, bantahan, apalagi cacian. Saya hanya berusaha memperjelas apa makna “bersikap profesional”.

Menurut saya, seseorang bisa dikatakan bersikap profesional ketika ia mampu memenuhi tuntutan profesinya, dengan mendapatkan imbalan yang layak, dan dengan memerhatikan kode etik dan standar perilaku yang berlaku di lingkungan kerjanya. Dalam konteks profesi seorang pendidik, sikap profesional ini misalnya: datang ke kelas dan membubarkan kelas tepat waktu (tidak korupsi waktu), datang ke kelas siap dengan materi, dan bisa mempertanggungjawabkan pekerjaannya, termasuk menjaga integritas anak didik dan diri sendiri dengan sikap yang tegas terhadap ketidakjujuran dan kegiatan contek-mencontek.

Lebih lanjut, seseorang bisa dikatakan mempunyai dedikasi terhadap pekerjaannya apabila ia mau memberikan lebih daripada apa yang dituntut darinya secara profesional. Seorang guru bisa dikatakan berdedikasi terhadap pekerjaannya apabila ia rela menggunakan waktu pribadinya di luar jam kerja untuk mengajar (atau lebih baik lagi, mendidik) anak-anak didiknya, baik itu formal ataupun non-formal. Yang satu ini memang tidak ada sangkut pautnya dengan imbalan apapun, dan lebih dekat pada kecintaan seseorang atau panggilan hatinya terhadap pekerjaannya.

Bentuk lain dari dedikasi adalah ketika seorang guru tetap mau menjalankan tugasnya secara profesional walaupun ia tidak menerima imbalan yang layak.

Nah, dalam tulisan yang saya baca, dan dari diskusi hangat di twitter kemarin, tampaknya belum dijelaskan apakah yang didiskusikan itu sikap profesional dan/atau berdedikasi. Tetapi esensi diskusi dan tulisan tetap sama, yaitu keprihatinan bersama bahwa banyak guru masa kini yang tidak lagi profesional, apalagi punya dedikasi terhadap pekerjaannya.

Guru yang tidak mau lembur demi acara bedah buku adalah guru yang tidak punya dedikasi terhadap pekerjaannya (meskipun apabila kita mau adil, harus dipahami juga bahwa untuk mau memberikan lebih daripada yang dituntunt secara profesional, ia harus lebih dulu mampu). Dalam hal ini, ia tetaplah guru yang profesional.

Di sisi lain dikatakan ada banyak guru yang membayar orang untuk mengerjakan karya ilmiahnya demi kenaikan pangkat (dan pada akhirnya kenaikan gaji), dan ini adalah sikap tidak profesional. Banyak contoh lain untuk perilaku tidak profesional, antara lain memberikan bocoran soal ujian kepada anak didiknya, yang berlawanan dengan tujuan pendidikan itu sendiri. Contoh yang lebih sederhana: sering tidak hadir di kelas karena “kepentingan pribadi”.

Bagaimana mungkin seseorang bisa punya dedikasi terhadap pekerjaan yang dilakukannya dengan tidak profesional?

Sekali lagi saya tegaskan bahwa ini adalah opini, bukan fakta, dan saya tidak menganggap semua guru itu tidak profesional apalagi punya dedikasi. Masih banyak pendidik yang bermutu dan patut kita sebut “Pahlawan Tanpa Tanda Jasa” (walaupun sebenarnya tidak masuk akal, karena sebutan itupun sudah merupakan suatu tanda jasa/bentuk penghargaan).

Guru itu memang sudah seharusnya profesional, tetapi kalo ia mempunyai dedikasi, itulah “Pahlawan Tanpa Tanda Jasa”.

Nah kalau sudah begini lalu menjadi jelas, apa sebenarnya yang bisa kita haruskan, dan apa yang kita harapkan dari para guru.

Punya integritas, tidak korupsi waktu, dan bertanggung jawab terhadap anak-anak didiknya; itu semua harus. Jika tidak, berarti ada masalah dengan si guru itu.

Tetap mau mengajar di pelosok desa walaupun tidak digaji atau mungkin digaji sangat kecil, atau mau bekerja di luar jam kerja; kalau kita mengharuskan itu, masalahnya adalah kita sendiri.